• Chapter 2
    "The Background"

    People have often asked me where I am from. Though this is probably a simple question for most, for me it is not so straightforward. Deep down I know that I am from nowhere and everywhere; from the same source spirit from which we all emerge and to which we will all return. I was born into this life in Mountain View, California, though that place has little meaning for me as I did not grow up there. In fact I have never lived there at all.

    My childhood was spent living in many various cities and states in the US. We tended to move fairly often when I was young, and I had a transient youth following my parents’ divorce when I was four years old. I spent time in various foster homes and with one parent or another throughout my childhood. The youngest of five children, some time was spent among my siblings and other times, not so much.

    I never laid down roots anywhere. I attended well over a dozen schools while growing up and did not have any life-long friends or any consistent relationships, even with my own family. The only thing that was really consistent in my life was the inevitable change.

    By the time I was an adult, I suffered from abandonment issues that affected the way I related to everyone who entered my life. I tended to keep everyone at a distance, knowing that I could not count on anyone to be present in the future. By not delving into deep love or intimacy, my young self hoped to avoid the pain of separation.

    By the time I was a teenager, I was troubled in many subtle and overt ways. Heading into adulthood, I also headed further into the darkness that I had become so familiar with. I married, worked hard, and built a family and a sporadically changing career, while facing a continual low-level depression.

    The life that society had told me I was supposed to live, the one that would supposedly bring satisfaction did little to quell my sadness and loneliness. I spent over a decade trudging to my various jobs, staying honest and working hard to make ends meet. Despite never having graduated from college, my hard worked paid off with promotions of responsibility (and occasional pay raises), ultimately landing me a job at Microsoft Corporation as an analyst.

    I had done well by the measures of the society in which I lived. I had earned my way, through adversity and now had all the indicators of a successful and happy person. I was married to a beautiful woman with whom I had raised a bright son to near adulthood. We had a condo in a top-rated suburb outside of Seattle. We pulled in a six-figure income. I drove a Cadillac and had access to the modern toys and conveniences that many strive to obtain. Surely, from most outside perspectives, I had it all.

    Most outside perspectives were precisely incorrect. I was truly miserable. I felt that I had sold my soul to serve a system that I did not agree with. I had conformed to a sick society and had compromised my values, while falling for the lie of the American dream. All the money and possessions in the world could not mask my broken heart and sickened and neglected soul.

    I still lived in debt. I worked away all my days and spent my nights serving a materialistic lifestyle or attempting to self-medicate away the depression. My marriage had grown stale and unhappy. My son carried little respect for the sacrifices that I had made and barely spoke to me at all. My workplace was filled with competitive back-stabbers who would betray their own mothers to get just one more rung up the corporate ladder.

    I spent my days enforcing company policies that crushed honest small businesses and favored the hefty profits of serving corrupt enterprises that brought little more than suffering onto the humanity that they claimed to serve in their endless advertising.

    Every morning I would wake (after slamming the snooze button as many times as possible) to suicidal thoughts. By this time in my life, I felt that I would rather die than go fight rush hour traffic to work a job that I despised and to serve a life that was completely unfulfilling.

    My health was failing. My marriage was crumbling. Everything that I had worked so hard for now felt worthless. Worst of all, I looked about the apparent issues in my life and the greater world, and realized that it was all hopelessly broken. There seemed no solutions to the greed and destruction, to the separation and confusion that had taken over the entire planet. Despite having faced years and years of depression, I had finally hit rock bottom and was in total despair.

    Music: “A Song That Is Happy”
    https://choon.co/tracks/0kflvpydvtk/a-song-that-is-happy/

    Image: “Devotions” by Cedar Branches (2011)
    Chapter 2 "The Background" People have often asked me where I am from. Though this is probably a simple question for most, for me it is not so straightforward. Deep down I know that I am from nowhere and everywhere; from the same source spirit from which we all emerge and to which we will all return. I was born into this life in Mountain View, California, though that place has little meaning for me as I did not grow up there. In fact I have never lived there at all. My childhood was spent living in many various cities and states in the US. We tended to move fairly often when I was young, and I had a transient youth following my parents’ divorce when I was four years old. I spent time in various foster homes and with one parent or another throughout my childhood. The youngest of five children, some time was spent among my siblings and other times, not so much. I never laid down roots anywhere. I attended well over a dozen schools while growing up and did not have any life-long friends or any consistent relationships, even with my own family. The only thing that was really consistent in my life was the inevitable change. By the time I was an adult, I suffered from abandonment issues that affected the way I related to everyone who entered my life. I tended to keep everyone at a distance, knowing that I could not count on anyone to be present in the future. By not delving into deep love or intimacy, my young self hoped to avoid the pain of separation. By the time I was a teenager, I was troubled in many subtle and overt ways. Heading into adulthood, I also headed further into the darkness that I had become so familiar with. I married, worked hard, and built a family and a sporadically changing career, while facing a continual low-level depression. The life that society had told me I was supposed to live, the one that would supposedly bring satisfaction did little to quell my sadness and loneliness. I spent over a decade trudging to my various jobs, staying honest and working hard to make ends meet. Despite never having graduated from college, my hard worked paid off with promotions of responsibility (and occasional pay raises), ultimately landing me a job at Microsoft Corporation as an analyst. I had done well by the measures of the society in which I lived. I had earned my way, through adversity and now had all the indicators of a successful and happy person. I was married to a beautiful woman with whom I had raised a bright son to near adulthood. We had a condo in a top-rated suburb outside of Seattle. We pulled in a six-figure income. I drove a Cadillac and had access to the modern toys and conveniences that many strive to obtain. Surely, from most outside perspectives, I had it all. Most outside perspectives were precisely incorrect. I was truly miserable. I felt that I had sold my soul to serve a system that I did not agree with. I had conformed to a sick society and had compromised my values, while falling for the lie of the American dream. All the money and possessions in the world could not mask my broken heart and sickened and neglected soul. I still lived in debt. I worked away all my days and spent my nights serving a materialistic lifestyle or attempting to self-medicate away the depression. My marriage had grown stale and unhappy. My son carried little respect for the sacrifices that I had made and barely spoke to me at all. My workplace was filled with competitive back-stabbers who would betray their own mothers to get just one more rung up the corporate ladder. I spent my days enforcing company policies that crushed honest small businesses and favored the hefty profits of serving corrupt enterprises that brought little more than suffering onto the humanity that they claimed to serve in their endless advertising. Every morning I would wake (after slamming the snooze button as many times as possible) to suicidal thoughts. By this time in my life, I felt that I would rather die than go fight rush hour traffic to work a job that I despised and to serve a life that was completely unfulfilling. My health was failing. My marriage was crumbling. Everything that I had worked so hard for now felt worthless. Worst of all, I looked about the apparent issues in my life and the greater world, and realized that it was all hopelessly broken. There seemed no solutions to the greed and destruction, to the separation and confusion that had taken over the entire planet. Despite having faced years and years of depression, I had finally hit rock bottom and was in total despair. Music: “A Song That Is Happy” https://choon.co/tracks/0kflvpydvtk/a-song-that-is-happy/ Image: “Devotions” by Cedar Branches (2011)
    1
    1 Comments 0 Shares
  • #NoRetreat
    May 2 #Restore to me the #joy of Thy #salvation, and #sustain me with a #willingSpirit.” #Psalm51:12
    Listen to #todaysDevotional

    #God #neverGivesup on #HisChildren! I #wonder how many of us might #admit “I thought #God had given up on me. There was a #moment when I had gotten so far away that I no longer felt the #intimacy I once had with God. But He just kept on #pursuing me and #helped me #recapture #lostGround.”

    How #thankful we should be for this #basic #truth: God wants to bring #His #children back to #Himself #regardless how far they have #retreated, or how much #ground they may have #surrendered. https://mailchi.mp/87d046297d61/the-truest-freedom-you-can-ever-experience-452297?e=9cbe669f39 #YHWH #DailyDevotion #DailyDevotional #Devotions #DailyDevotions #Devotion #Devotional #BibleStudy #JesusChrist #Jesus #Christ #NeverSurrender #NeverRetreat #NeverGiveUp #GalaxyQuest #TakeAStand #StandYourGround #DontBackDown #success #motivationalquote #dailymotivation #inspiration #motivation
    #NoRetreat May 2 #Restore to me the #joy of Thy #salvation, and #sustain me with a #willingSpirit.” #Psalm51:12 Listen to #todaysDevotional #God #neverGivesup on #HisChildren! I #wonder how many of us might #admit “I thought #God had given up on me. There was a #moment when I had gotten so far away that I no longer felt the #intimacy I once had with God. But He just kept on #pursuing me and #helped me #recapture #lostGround.” How #thankful we should be for this #basic #truth: God wants to bring #His #children back to #Himself #regardless how far they have #retreated, or how much #ground they may have #surrendered. https://mailchi.mp/87d046297d61/the-truest-freedom-you-can-ever-experience-452297?e=9cbe669f39 #YHWH #DailyDevotion #DailyDevotional #Devotions #DailyDevotions #Devotion #Devotional #BibleStudy #JesusChrist #Jesus #Christ #NeverSurrender #NeverRetreat #NeverGiveUp #GalaxyQuest #TakeAStand #StandYourGround #DontBackDown #success #motivationalquote #dailymotivation #inspiration #motivation
    No Retreat
    God delights in restoring power and harmony to our lives.
    MAILCHI.MP
    0 Comments 0 Shares
  • Canada WAKE-UP!!!!!
    In the 70s when we were in Iran, we were hearing then that Muslims were taking over little by little. Now we see what is happening so far.
    
2 years from now, I will be in Heaven - This was written by a woman born in Egypt as a Muslim. Make sure you read the paragraph ( in red ) toward the end.
    
Joys of Muslim Women
    
By Nonie Darwish
    In the Muslim faith a Muslim man can marry a child as young as 1 year old and have sexual intimacy with this child. Consummating the marriage by 9.

    The dowry is given to the family in exchange for the woman (who becomes his slave) and for the purchase of the private parts of the woman, to use her as a toy.
    Even though a woman is abused she cannot obtain a divorce. To prove rape, the woman must have (4) male witnesses.

    Often after a woman has been raped, she is returned to her family and the family must return the dowry.

    The family has the right to execute her (an honor killing) to restore the honor of the family.

    Husbands can beat their wives 'at will' and he does not have to say why he has beaten her.
    The husband is permitted to have (4 wives) and a temporary wife for an hour (prostitute) at his discretion.
    The Sharia Muslim law controls the private as well as the public life of the woman.

    (In twenty years there will be enough Muslim voters in Canada, Australia, the U.S. And Britain To elect the heads of Government by themselves!

    Rest assured they will do so... You can look at how they have almost taken over several towns in the USA.. Dearborn Mich. is one and there are others.. Britain has several cities now with Sharia Law controlled zones, totally controlled by Muslims)
    I think everyone in Canada, Australia, the U.S And Great Britain should be required to read this, but with the ACLU, there is no way this will be widely publicized, unless each of us sends it on!

    It is too bad that so many are disillusioned with life and Christianity to accept Muslims as peaceful. Some may be but they have an army that is willing to shed blood in the name of Islam.

    The peaceful support the warriors with their finances and own kind of patriotism to their religion.

    While Canada, Australia, the U.S.A. and Britain are getting rid of Christianity from all public sites and erasing God from the lives of children the Muslims are planning a great jihad on North America, Australia and Britain.
    This is your chance to make a difference!
    Canada WAKE-UP!!!!! In the 70s when we were in Iran, we were hearing then that Muslims were taking over little by little. Now we see what is happening so far. 
2 years from now, I will be in Heaven - This was written by a woman born in Egypt as a Muslim. Make sure you read the paragraph ( in red ) toward the end. 
Joys of Muslim Women 
By Nonie Darwish In the Muslim faith a Muslim man can marry a child as young as 1 year old and have sexual intimacy with this child. Consummating the marriage by 9. The dowry is given to the family in exchange for the woman (who becomes his slave) and for the purchase of the private parts of the woman, to use her as a toy. Even though a woman is abused she cannot obtain a divorce. To prove rape, the woman must have (4) male witnesses. Often after a woman has been raped, she is returned to her family and the family must return the dowry. The family has the right to execute her (an honor killing) to restore the honor of the family. Husbands can beat their wives 'at will' and he does not have to say why he has beaten her. The husband is permitted to have (4 wives) and a temporary wife for an hour (prostitute) at his discretion. The Sharia Muslim law controls the private as well as the public life of the woman. (In twenty years there will be enough Muslim voters in Canada, Australia, the U.S. And Britain To elect the heads of Government by themselves! Rest assured they will do so... You can look at how they have almost taken over several towns in the USA.. Dearborn Mich. is one and there are others.. Britain has several cities now with Sharia Law controlled zones, totally controlled by Muslims) I think everyone in Canada, Australia, the U.S And Great Britain should be required to read this, but with the ACLU, there is no way this will be widely publicized, unless each of us sends it on! It is too bad that so many are disillusioned with life and Christianity to accept Muslims as peaceful. Some may be but they have an army that is willing to shed blood in the name of Islam. The peaceful support the warriors with their finances and own kind of patriotism to their religion. While Canada, Australia, the U.S.A. and Britain are getting rid of Christianity from all public sites and erasing God from the lives of children the Muslims are planning a great jihad on North America, Australia and Britain. This is your chance to make a difference!
    1
    0 Comments 0 Shares
  • #Oil and #Spices”
    April 18
    #Nicodemus, who had first come to Him by night, also came, bringing a #mixture of #myrrh and #aloes, about a hundred #pounds #weight. So they took the #body of #Jesus and #bound it in #linen #wrappings with the spices, as is the #burial custom of the #Jews. #John19:39-40
    Listen to #todaysDevotional


    The amount of spices brought to #embalm Jesus was #generous and #abundant – on par with #royalBurials. This was a #lavish #display of #affection and #respect. Though we have already #seen how Jesus was #maliciously and #cruelly #treated #before and #during His #crucifixion, after His #death His body was #cared for in a #royal #fashion, pointing toward His #role as our #King.


    The spices referred to in these #verses are ones that played a significant role in the events of #PassionWeek. #Spikenard, a #rare and #costly #fragrantOil having an #earthy, #wood-like #aroma, was used by #Mary of #Bethany to anoint the #head and #feet of the #Messiah. Spikenard speaks of the #Bride's #extravagant #adoration of and #intimacy with the #Bridegroom, in #total #abandonment, #withoutRegard to #cost.

    #Myrrh, an #exotic #Biblical #spice, was used in #purification and #beautification #rites, in the #formula for the #HolyAnointingOil, and in #burialSpices. #Bitter to the #taste but #sweet to the #smell, myrrh in the #spiritual sense speaks of #dying to self to become a " #sweetSmelling #savor" to the #Lord.

    #Hyssop is a low #growing #evergreen, #cultivated for its #flowerTops, and #leaves which have an #intense #mintyAroma. It #symbolizes #spiritualCleansing by the #refiningFire of the #HolySpirit: " #PurgeMeWithHyssop, and I shall be #clean: #washMe, and I shall be #whiterThanSnow."
    In #temple days, #incense containing #frankincense, a sweet #balsamic #treeResin, was placed on the #InnerAltar of the #Tabernacle and #burned #morning and #evening. #Frankincense was also one of the #gifts brought by the #wiseMen soon after #Christ’s #birth, #foreshadowing the #fact that He was #born to #die – on our #behalf.

    #Imagine the combined aroma of all of the #scents of the various spices, remember the price Jesus paid, and the price paid by those who buried Him so #honorably. Shouldn't we #lavish our #love on One who has #loved us so #generously #Himself? In fact, of all the #gifts you can #give to #God, one that He holds most #precious is your #heart, your #personalDevotion. #Psalm141:2 likens our #prayers to " #incense." Why not #surrender your #heart #afresh in a #prayer of #praise and #devotion, a #sacrifice#pleasingToTheLord?”


    #Prayer:
    Jesus, I want to be among those who #honor You. I want to give the gift that means most to You – my heart, #soul, and #body. All that I am, all that I’ll ever be. Help me #holdNothingBack. You are a #worthyKing, completely #deserving of my #totalDedication. As a #fragrant #offering, as best I know how, I #surrender my all to You – just as You surrendered Your all for me. https://mailchi.mp/92651cab379e/last-supper-p11xhrx3h5-452225?e=9cbe669f39
    “ #Oil and #Spices” April 18 #Nicodemus, who had first come to Him by night, also came, bringing a #mixture of #myrrh and #aloes, about a hundred #pounds #weight. So they took the #body of #Jesus and #bound it in #linen #wrappings with the spices, as is the #burial custom of the #Jews. #John19:39-40 Listen to #todaysDevotional The amount of spices brought to #embalm Jesus was #generous and #abundant – on par with #royalBurials. This was a #lavish #display of #affection and #respect. Though we have already #seen how Jesus was #maliciously and #cruelly #treated #before and #during His #crucifixion, after His #death His body was #cared for in a #royal #fashion, pointing toward His #role as our #King. The spices referred to in these #verses are ones that played a significant role in the events of #PassionWeek. #Spikenard, a #rare and #costly #fragrantOil having an #earthy, #wood-like #aroma, was used by #Mary of #Bethany to anoint the #head and #feet of the #Messiah. Spikenard speaks of the #Bride's #extravagant #adoration of and #intimacy with the #Bridegroom, in #total #abandonment, #withoutRegard to #cost. #Myrrh, an #exotic #Biblical #spice, was used in #purification and #beautification #rites, in the #formula for the #HolyAnointingOil, and in #burialSpices. #Bitter to the #taste but #sweet to the #smell, myrrh in the #spiritual sense speaks of #dying to self to become a " #sweetSmelling #savor" to the #Lord. #Hyssop is a low #growing #evergreen, #cultivated for its #flowerTops, and #leaves which have an #intense #mintyAroma. It #symbolizes #spiritualCleansing by the #refiningFire of the #HolySpirit: " #PurgeMeWithHyssop, and I shall be #clean: #washMe, and I shall be #whiterThanSnow." In #temple days, #incense containing #frankincense, a sweet #balsamic #treeResin, was placed on the #InnerAltar of the #Tabernacle and #burned #morning and #evening. #Frankincense was also one of the #gifts brought by the #wiseMen soon after #Christ’s #birth, #foreshadowing the #fact that He was #born to #die – on our #behalf. #Imagine the combined aroma of all of the #scents of the various spices, remember the price Jesus paid, and the price paid by those who buried Him so #honorably. Shouldn't we #lavish our #love on One who has #loved us so #generously #Himself? In fact, of all the #gifts you can #give to #God, one that He holds most #precious is your #heart, your #personalDevotion. #Psalm141:2 likens our #prayers to " #incense." Why not #surrender your #heart #afresh in a #prayer of #praise and #devotion, a #sacrifice “ #pleasingToTheLord?” #Prayer: Jesus, I want to be among those who #honor You. I want to give the gift that means most to You – my heart, #soul, and #body. All that I am, all that I’ll ever be. Help me #holdNothingBack. You are a #worthyKing, completely #deserving of my #totalDedication. As a #fragrant #offering, as best I know how, I #surrender my all to You – just as You surrendered Your all for me. https://mailchi.mp/92651cab379e/last-supper-p11xhrx3h5-452225?e=9cbe669f39
    "Oil and Spices"
    The amount of spices brought to embalm Jesus is generous and abundant - on par with royal burials.
    MAILCHI.MP
    0 Comments 0 Shares

No results to show

No results to show

No results to show

No results to show

No results to show